I spent this weekend in Oxford, and one of the many sights is "The Bridge of Sighs". No, not the actual Bridge of Sighs ... that's in Venice. I should know, I've seen it. This was merely some 20th Century knock-off, "inspired by" the proper tourist landmark.

And then it dawned on me ... I've also seen the Tower on Petrin Hill (in Prague) which is the Eiffel Tower rip-off, and then Lions Gate Bridge (in Vancouver) which is the Golden Gate Bridge knock-off. Are there others?? I'm going to Glasgow for Easter - will I see an Opera House knock-off? Or what about the pyramids in Cardiff? It seems you can see the world, without ever going to most of these places! What a con ....

I'M DOWN WITH THAT: Things I Love About Oxford
* The slower pace - not so much Oxford itself, but its nice to be out of London, where everyone just walks that little bit slower, and its not all about hurrying through life
* The architecture - the buildings are just amazing, particularly going round the different Colleges. Hard to imagine going to University here ... slightly more impressive than Auckland, thats for sure!
* The nostalgia of "Welcome Breaks" - these are just the service stops on the motorways ... but it bought back all the memories of Europe, eating too much chocolate, diet coke and of course, Pringles!

WHAT'S WITH THAT?: Things I Loathe About Oxford
* New Zealand-bashing - I did a city tour, that included visiting most of the colleges. The tour guide made a really obnoxious NZ reference, when he spoke about how Professor Tolkein attended Oxford University, thus NZ owed its success to Oxford etc. Wanker!
* The rain - and my GOD, it rained! And rained! And then just when you thought it had stopped raining, it started right up again!
* Feeling old - Oxford is, of course, a city for students. Think Dunedin if you will. I just felt unbelievably old, even at 26, when these barely-18 year olds kept harrassing us in the pubs.

I am completely suffering from can't-be-arsed-itis ... otherwise known as Monday! There is definitely some correlation to my not having had a V, but even still. And so I present:
GREAT EXCUSES FOR MONDAY MORNINGS:
* If its all the same to you, I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all the guns today
* My stigmata are acting up
* I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up to work. OK
* Constipation has made me a walking timebomb
* I just found out that I was switched at birth. Legally, I shouldn't come into work knowing that employee records now contain false information
* The psychiatrist said it was an excellent session. He even gave me this jaw restraint so I won't bite things when I am startled
* The dog ate my car keys. We are going to hitchhike to the vet and give her eternal peace